We were dropping events before because libdispatch calls kevent with this flag to update a knote without checking for new events; when it did that and we handed it some new events, it would ignore them since they didn't contain `EV_ERROR`, which meant those events were lost forever.
If the copyout callback for a filter indicates that the event should be ignored/dropped, we should not process EV_DISPATCH or EV_ONESHOT, as this would lead to missing actual events in the future.
Some filters (e.g. EVFILT_PROC) do specifically want to process EV_ONESHOT even when dropping an event, so this also introduces a special filter ID (EVFILT_DROP_POSTPROCESS) that enables the old behavior for individual events. Additionally, rather than just using `0` as a special filter ID, this commit introduces EVFILT_DROP (to be clear about its meaning).
See the darlingserver repo for the majority of the logic behind the new implementation.
TODO: libkqueue needs proper kevent_qos support in order to be able to use the data_out parameter passed in to kevent_qos calls (which is what *should* be passed as the default buffer to use when ext[0] is not available in EVFILT_MACHPORT).
If multiple threads are waiting on the same kqueue, they'll all be woken up at the same time, however only one can acquire the lock at a time. The one that acquires it first gets to consume some events from the kqueue while everyone else waits. But, after they're done and they release the lock, the next person will have *less events available*. We were previously neglecting to check for this and trying to consume more events than were available (leading to some nasty deadlocks with certain events like EVFILT_USER).
